Lactose intolerants, UNITE!

is lactose intolerance attractive?

Not at all.  Like many Asian folks, I have a weak dairy disposition. I’ve dated some people who are lactose intolerant; I’m cool with it. I guess it can be overlooked as long as you aren’t constantly sucking on cheese popsicles and running to public bathrooms every twelve minutes. (No matter how discreet you are, there is always a mental picture as soon as you leave the table.) Might wanna try some drug-store brand Lactaid. It’ll only set you back about $2 / bottle.

I had a boyfriend who was quite intolerant of my  intolerance. He did not support my conflicting love of dairy and need to violently explode afterwards. Then, he’d get angry at me and proceed to bring up my “situation”
tactlessly in front of folks to embarrass me. A little tacky…Hmph! If that is your problem, too, then I suggest you dump the person and not teh dairy. Cheese don’t judge, and remains deelish!

VIVA LECHE!

it’s JOE TIME!

he seems like a nice old man!

“Do you watch “Judge Joe Brown?” Are you down with JOE TIME?”

Why, yes! I am quite down with JOE TIME. I like when he polls the folks in the courtroom (let’s pretend it’s not an “audience” ok?) “Press YES if you think she is scandalous and press NO if you think he is the father of this child!” If only more things in life came with a polling option…I would be more decisive.

….i think.

good look!

I saw the flyer attached to your email. Binky is cute, is she single?

Sorry y’all…but the Binky is very married. Thought you knew?

RELATED:
“Why are you and Binky always together?”

Binky has been my undercover bff (best friend forever)  since high school! I am blessed to have such a talented, emotionally healthy, and hilarious friend! <3 We used tocreate and carry out conspiracies. We are the best.

l33t

“WHAT HAPPENS IF THE TRIFORCE IS NOT UNITED AND EVIL REIGNS OVER HYRULE? WHAT BECOMES OF THE CHILDREN?”

I’m sorry to say, but it is quite obvious that the children will be sold. Sold, then eaten. While the sale of the children of Hyrule seems to be frightening prospect, the only thing they can do is wait around in the grassy knoll in the hopes that Link hurries his ass up and collects all them damn jewels and potions already! I know they all hidden betwixt the sheaves and whatnot, but he got that new rolling move, so I am sure he can expedite the process…he just don’t feel like it. HE IS THE LAST GREAT HOPE.  (PS:The bird people from that island in “The Wind Waker” —- I don’t trust them. I  bet they’re really at the bottom of all this….despite looking honorable and stoic. ALL LIES!)

sweaty betty.

“Why are you so lovely (even when you’re sweaty?)”

Why, thank you! These glands of mine are both a blessing and a curse. I sweat a lot when i perform (but hahah! even when i’m not performing), because I get all nervous. Some of it might have to do with your system (respiratory? circulatory, i forget?) A lot of sweaty people I know have recommended one, or the combination of the following: Certain Dri anti-perspirant (available over the counter), drinking more water, regular exercise, using baby powder everywhere (including your scalp), and a bunch of toher things I can’t recall. For those of you who are sweaty momos (like me) here is some further online reading:

http://kidshealth.org/teen/question/hygiene/sweat.html

hyperhidrosis
flash presentation!
natural remedies